Here are some ways we've been learning to walk together.
1. Leashes.
It's official! I'm one of those moms....the kind I always judged. But the fact is, my girls love their leashes! They often like to wear them around the house and incite the cats to chase their "tails". Just because they wear their backpacks does not mean I have to be holding onto the leash. If they are with me, they don't need me to hold onto it. Once I figured that out, we did better. If they already have their backpacks on when we start walking, it's easy for me to grab the leash if they both suddenly run in opposite directions.
2. Practice, practice, practice.
It does not work for me to practice in the apartment. There are too many distractions, and it's too confusing for them. Fortunately I live in a safe apartment complex, in which I know a good number of people I believe I can trust. There are long winding hallways perfect for exploration. If someone turns a corner without me, I have time to grab the twin behind me and run after the one that disappeared around the bend. They can't have gone anywhere, and there's not enough time for someone to nab them and hide. (Call me paranoid.) It's also great to get kids together and take other moms with you!3. Communication.
Your little one cannot meet your expectations if they are not understood. A friend and fellow mom, Abby, suggests using short, one word expressions. She lets her girls (ages 22 months and 2.5 years) wander ahead of her until they've reached a distance she isn't comfortable with. Then she yells ahead, "Stop!" and her oldest will jump and yell "Stop!" and stop. It's a game in which her kids willingly participate. (You can visit Abby's blog here.)
While it's important to use words they understand, I think it's also important to acknowledge that you understand what your child wants. My girls haven't really started communicating verbally yet. One of the biggest frustrations for them is when I don't understand them. I'm slowly realizing that when I acknowledge what they want to do and give them an alternative, they are far more likely to respond positively. For example, instead of saying, "No!" when they get too close to an outlet, now they enjoy pointing to the outlets because they know I'll say "OUCH!" (They also know they'll get their fingers slapped if they touch. But it's the game of saying "ouch" that turned that lesson from something negative to something positive.) With that in mind, when one twin tries to run ahead somewhere, I hold their hands and say, "You want to go over there? OK. We can go! But let's get sister first." I have far fewer tantrums in the middle of the apartment hallways.
4. Incentive.
One of the words my girls definitely understand is "food". When they are tired after walking for a while, and they are less apt to obey, food is always a great incentive. Even if we are just going home to get lunch. If I can communicate that we are all making the trip to get food, they come without question.
5. Safety spot. Just bought this car magnet online. Be careful in the parking lots! That's really the hardest thing for me to figure out: what to do with one twin when I'm putting the other in her car seat! I haven't come up with an answer for sure yet, but I like the idea of this safety spot. My girls are not even 18 months yet, so we certainly haven't perfected the concept of staying still. Any advice in this department?
In my next several posts I'm planning to review some safe places to practice walking together! I've got a few up my sleeve, but I'm always interested to hear new places to visit! Please email me if you have any suggestions!
